Rebellion

I need to know...

Why this need

To always swim against the tide

The River merges with the Sea

Yet I fight with both River and Sea

Only to see and speak with Thee

Why rebel?

When you can revel in God's glamour

Tight jeans and loose pockets

I see them all 

Wonder where I fall

No money for glamour

Only ideas that clamour

Someday I too will fit in

Find brothers and sisters

Find love of the beyond

True meaning of all forms

Sinful Sex and Sinister Vibes

Beyond Good and Evil

Is there such a Divine place?

Where even God chills

Until then I rebel...

Find my place in the world

I am done with the perfect

Beauty is fleeting

What is will never be

What could be

What may be

Is forever in me...

Birthday

Born and Celebrate

No hate, no mistakes

Only love, cake and distaste

I can't smile anymore

So lost I am

I can't pretend to like you

Or like myself

It's not working anymore

Why was I born

Certainly not to celebrate

Remembering the haste

Childhood, Schools, Teachers and Waste

Nothing much of value

Waiting for future fortunes which never came

Now I am here

All alone

No one to speak or read my poetry

What a waste it all was

Saving the World

Saving ourselves

What did we even gain?

Leaders came and lost

They spoke and I got lost

Spiritual, Business, Arts, Academic, Sports

Its all the same

Inflated egos and lifestyles

One man to lead

Rest to follow

My miseries I swallow

Never got why this even is

Why can't we be friends?

Its my birthday again

Another year of misery and failures

Another year of loosing it all

Yet I need to smile when you say

Happy Birthday!!!!

I am not happy

Its not my birthday

There is no time

There is no space

Just existence

Forever was

Forever is

I am the creator

I am the created

No time for cake

No mistakes or distastes

Just existence

Failure

So its you again...

We have lifetimes together

It really does hurt

To walk in hopes of reaching the Stars

Yet I do try

Only to touch what is real

Someday I will learn

How to succeed

How to lay eggs for spring to come

How to wait for magic

For my time will come

Am tired of pretending

That perfect rhyme and story

I surely failed 

For failure won't come

Just stillness in pieces

That wait till eternity

Till failure finally falls

Even death hails its call

What to do

Where to go

For I have failed

There is no more hope

No path No shore No friends No foe

Art Science Technology Philosophy

I tried a hand at all

Somehow never reached home

I did leave home though

Just lost my stride and ride

Fell short and wide

I am not sad

Just confused

How long to wait 

For Beauty and Grace

Money and Pride

Love and Hate

It's all numb now

No where to go

Destroyed dreams 

Disturbed reality

Simply waiting

For light darkness might and what's right

Deep down I see my fault

Poor vision Poor mind Poor skills Poor time

It was all me

Dreams of Infinity

Baseless Reality

Decades lost

Now I wonder

Was it better to have settled?

Life of mediocrity

Surviving another day

Just to fit in and be sane

Be a sheep and make hay

But I chose to be insane

Be unreasonable till my dying breath

I came with nothing 

I will go with nothing

Still I got everything

You can never defeat me

For, I never wanted to win

Oh Poetry...

Years passed breathing off your crevices

Only lived for your beauty and love

I betrayed your trust and my tears lost their muse

Back again, I wonder how many words do I need

To feel the greed to be at your feet

I missed this...

Stirring my soul for timeless visions of your grace

After eons of exploring emptiness of the Spirit

Here I am, expressing Silence through Words

What can I say that hasn't been blessed with visions

Life Death Love Sex Faith Disgrace God and Hate

So much to say, yet so little space

To humans vomiting of data and disgrace

In a cosmos of empty space

Oh poetry, why did you leave my heart?

How I went in circles searching my empty vase

The Spirit rose and graced my tears

Now I say with folded hands...

I loved every word you never said

The gap between your words

The scars at endless shores