IF.......

The word beats the silence far across
It mutes the thunders torturing my soul
I feed on fantasy for just a while……..
This road seems to go for miles and miles…..
Struggle seems to loose significance
As life moves towards magnificence
It sucks the pain out of reality
Seems much more than vitality

What if I never grew up so early…
What if I never witnessed the violence’s that I did…
What if I ever made friends….
What if u loved me….
For once….just once…
My faith in god would be restored

Emotions storm inside as my life stares at me
Misunderstood realities mock at me
My inability to live the perfect life
to cry and still dream of the perfect life

the word if strengthens me to hold on….
To stitch the realities ruthlessly torn
To feel the reasons and logic long gone

But still there is comfort in pain…
For change is what we all are afraid of
Surely there is nothing to gain
My feet are stuck and it’s hard to move on…

I take deep breaths to understand more than I can write
Nothing in life ever seems to go right….
Its just a will survive
To prove that my values were right…..

If I can love anyone again….
If I can be loved by anyone again…
If I can feel the zest in my viens again…
If I can believe once again that “ I am the one”

My life will become worth living…
The sky will tear and the grounds will shake
For I have come to existence again
I will move faster than light and caress through all the black holes
For I am the universe and the universe is me….
If only I can…if only…