Being and Love

Everything is Nothing

2012-01-04T11:40:00.000-08:00

Truth, Beauty and Love
Like the five elements
You come from within

Sweeping time across your feet
Feeling every pain
Seeping in every grain
nothing to everything

The savage sage searches you
Travels to tormented trees
Wishes for the whole world
Laments his lawful lust

The journey begins with division
Green grass and tangerine divides
Echoes make me obey
Outside, the world sustains
Everything is something

The journey whispers with zest
Details make bridges and dungeons
Sitting on a rising halo
I measure my wisdom walls
Everything is everything

Caring for the flame
Burning me inside
I surrender all fears
The ashes caress deep space
Dancing with the photons
Soon...it ends again
Everything is Nothing.

I love you till you don't

2011-12-02T04:12:00.001-08:00

Fleeting feelings of fevers
Wounded by the heartland
heralded by my tribunal
sanctify the disturbance

Chasing still souls
searching undone holes
feeding hungry tigers
living on the unknown

What I have goes away
What I dont have stays

The permanence of transience
Leashes forever

Rivers rifting for rescue tolls
Leaves rusting for thunder pours

Riding on a white horse
Your light in shining armor
Love's you till the beginning
Love's you before it ends

Touch me through the vein
Luster, my love
Let me leave you again.

Wait of decide

2011-11-15T15:37:00.000-08:00

Spiral rods for straight roads
Circular beasts in tender nests
Bequeathed breath of borrowed bread
Waiting for decide

Sunrays of heroes
Surveys until dawn
Smooth viruses
Images of Power
Persistence of loss

Visions with violets
Violence of beginnings
Thunder of Sabbaticals
Waving to decide

Beauty of love
Lustful wanders
Lenders of ancient times
Explain gargled wisdom

My thoughts on a sail
Deciding to wait
Floating snails
Scream of avalanches
Weighting to decide

Let her go

2011-10-24T13:32:00.000-07:00

Flowing effortlessly
Like grains of sand
Into her magic land
Let her go my friend.

Feelings tremble
A shadow of pain
Shining bright
Let her go again.

The world ends
Thoughts freeze
Visions coagulate
Just tonight
Let her go my friend

People turn vicious
Words feel dusted
Ideas seem dogmatic
To set you free
Let her come to me

Hope springs in the summer
Warm and effervescent
Touches me deep inside
Heals the crying light.
Feeds her to me tonight

Dreams dripping down the dew
Makers mend me a muse
A ballad bursts by the balloon
Let her grow my friend

Who has the time

2011-10-23T00:04:00.000-07:00

I say, I wonder
Time condones and comforts us
It thinks and she sings
Leaves tinker with shyness
In a labyrinth of emotions
They call to my vileness
But who has the time

I wish, I dare
To think of you as mine
Wandering in the dark ages
Going through life's stages
A smile of eternity
A promise of sovereignty
But who has the time

I think, I stare
To share my soul
I strive to hear
Your lonely whispers
In fearful vain I gasp
The inherited loss
But who has the time

I feel, I care
All that I dont understand
To see the darkness
Beyond my illusions
Beneath your reality
Into the soul of humanity
But who has the time

I touch, I cry
Something lurking between you
Tormented love and tested lust
Figurines of violet roses
Dance to the shaman tune
Gazing to the devastated stars

Time always had us.

Moments of Worth

2011-10-14T12:23:00.000-07:00

Losing time to gain worth

Gifting time by leasing worth

Words observe and judge

One worth can feel it small

Persisting with time

To end it all

Creatively destroying your wonders

I still gaze with wonder

What is your moment?

What is my worth?

Endless pontifications

Mystifying into

Streams of Creativity

Beginning as

Drains of drudgery

Ending as

Karmic Cavalry

Galaxies whisper

Stars orchestrate

Your moment is my time

Your worth is beyond mine.

Gravity

2011-10-12T01:41:00.001-07:00

Free fall my lovely

Endurance of our sapphire enduring

Wishing of our silver wishes

Breathing of your violet breaths

Thoughts of our muddy thinking

Kissing of your ruby kisses

Wishing of our emerald wishes

Touching of your tourmaline touches

Being of our effervescent beings.

Chaos

2011-10-09T06:51:00.000-07:00

I love you
I truly do, Chaos

You enter me deep
You leave me asleep

I wish to wonder
If I ever can
Understand
Like you understand

Feelings feel to me
Thoughts heal for me
Ideas kneel to thee

Only to think
Outside the box
I explore the box

Fly with me, Chaos
Let me show you the frills
Teach me your skills

Learn my pain
Leave me again

Teach me change
Leash me again

Don't be scared

2011-10-05T23:18:00.001-07:00

Nobody agrees
Nobody cares

I am nobody

Somebody loves
Somebody snares

I am somebody

Nothing dies
Nothing lives

I am nothing

Something feels
Something touches

I am something

No one dreams
No one flies

I am no one

Someone kisses
Someone kills

I am someone

Don't Lie

2011-09-30T02:37:00.000-07:00

Heaven's cry until the end of time

Don't lie my child
Nothing will be fine.

Sometimes, its just the way
You are being driven astray

Don't submit to everything
Don't submit for nothing

My tears speak and words feel

Don't lie my child
Everything will be fine.

I am the one

2011-09-28T00:43:00.000-07:00

Visit the words and vanquish the idea
Imagine the thought and indulge the being

Presence diminishes and prejudice kills the illusion
Sometimes its me, sometimes its me, waiting to be

Repeat the words and resound in it
I am the one.

While I am lost

2011-09-13T19:04:00.000-07:00

While I am lost
Say a few words for me
Wish me luck in this sojourn
For I am never to return

While I am lost
Sing a few lullabies
Wish me death
For I ousted this test

While I am lost
Swell some limericks
Laugh at me in vain
For I am leaving again

While I am lost
Swish some symphonies
Love me some more
For I love you no more

While I am lost
Give me another cause
Wish me some pain
For the darkness should remain

While I am lost
Feed me to your thoughts
Ask me why you ever listened
For I never listened

Birthdays

2011-09-06T02:39:00.000-07:00

Sing the hallowed songs of joy
For another year I live with this toy
Just to see if it ever stops
Just to see if it ever stalks

Birthdays come and they stay
Only to haunt me every day
How I stare at you
How you shy away

Is there a guilt you harbor?
Is there a morality you harbor?
There is a life I truly harbor.

Colder, Bolder and older
That is not what I told her
Warmer, wiser and weaker
Wish I could speak to her

In all my weakness lies all my strength
In all my fears lies all my courage
In all my love lies all my hate

Oblivious to all the contradiction
Oblivious to all the pain
You choose to make me sane

Vindicate me, O holy Chaos
From this world of persistent soldiers
Into the world of poignant explorers

Render me another birthday
One I wish would stay.

Beginnings

2011-08-28T15:02:00.000-07:00

Beginnings are strange
Endings are stranger

I wonder how long does it pain
Does it ever die in vain?

I think not that I understand
I wonder when will I understand

It was never normal
I was never abnormal
It’s just about moving on
It’s just hard not to move on

The heart aches deeply but slowly
The feelings numb slowly but deeply

Old feelings, old illusions and old lands
New faces, new ideas and new lamps

Time flows in many ways
The heart stays and mind sways

Wishes wish until death
Did I ever say what I meant?

It’s you the heart always wanted
It’s me the mind always wanted

Soulful Earrings and Dreamy Eyes

2011-08-09T10:44:00.000-07:00

Boundless beauty and bounful ties
Intricate thoughts and infinite minds
Indian ways and western nays
Eastern says and American hays

I thought I always knew
You knew you always thought
He was self-taught
Always there to tie the knot

Simple sayings dedicated to complex ideas
Single wishes destroyed by conjugal pariahs

Something was always lurking beyond you two
Someone will always exist for you too

Your insecurities will always remain
The thoughts will always constrain
The love shall always sustain

Whose structure is to stay?
Whose love will fade away?
Whose truth is it anyway?
Only time will stay
Rest all will fade away…

Creative cavalry is a constant cause
Blessed in the bliss of boldness
Daunting djinn's of dusty dreams
Often ogle with ominous oldness

How far are you willing to go?
How long are you going to bow?
Who’s to judge who runs the show?
All I know…
This is no place to make a foe

Some come only to go
Others stay till we grow old
I just see a perfect mold…
Your journeys will be forever told

The plea calls from the saintly shadows…

Rust in the yellow breeze
Rise under the blue tide
Return with the golden stride
Conquer the bloody divide!

My dear friends…
It was a pleasure to spend sometime
My being was made with your time
Never do we understand the taciturnity of time
Memories remain and thought’s fade away
The beauty & love will perennially stay.

Structualism

2011-07-29T11:46:00.001-07:00

Beyond and beneath the blue sea breeze
A desperate sailor disguises her despair
She scorns her sojourn in this succulent structure
Asking me to analyze its alluring rupture
Warning me not to wane her pain…
Gorgeously I graft away in grains

You see me out there and invite us
Conniving and twisting at your will
Changing and deforming as you will
Making me twist along side
A structure you are now
Do watch out for me…

You see me but I cannot see you
I feel you but you don’t wish to
You are everywhere
I am right here
Thinking...

I eat, sleep and live because of you
I wonder how you gave me the right to think!
With disillusioned eyes I often blink…
I am your slave…I think!

Did I exist for you?
You certainly do
Did you ever care?
I gave my life for you…

Hierarchies I never loved
But I see it in you.
I conquer you only to my hate
Please… set me free to my fate!

You exist in empty spaces
Still...I search for your traces
You make me and my fellow beings
Who gave you the right?
My brother loathes me…
Are you ashamed?
Yet, I bow to you…
Now... do you care?

Hope is the cause and cure
With you I will never be sure
My body is naked because you
It wants to be naked without you

Our ideas are your words
Your words submerge our ideas
My wisdom adds to your knowledge
Your knowledge ousts my wisdom

But when I overpower you
Illusions exists beyond you
For a while, your existence is true

We exist in our duality
I come from you
Into you
Still not you
Still within you

I try and understand your shapes
Only to forge your clandestine drapes

I feel the ability to transcend atoms
I fear the agility to transcend you

I seek my own freedom
You seek your own protection

Endless journeys begin with an ending
Ours never ended…

Your feelings I cannot reason
My reasons you will someday feel…

Under the Ulysses of undying unrest
Endless explanations endure the test
Her hiatus heals as the hour ticks
Idiosyncratic illusions ire in bricks

Emptiness

2011-07-15T13:43:00.000-07:00

A message from you comes from my eyes
Feelings haunt and tear the veil
Exposing the naked me
Halting and tarnishing the inner me

Feelings are mirages of illusions
How strong is the feeling of illusions...
The illusion of feelings?

The familiarity of pain never disappoints
Elating me everytime it arrives
Making me feel...
The best I ever can

I miss you beyond meanings and ideas
Maybe I just miss myself crying for you...
For I don’t feel truth anymore

Just another chance I reined
To believe in my innocence
Or just be guilty and feel the pain?
Our pages of eternity are forever dusted and drained...

The thought of you is haunting
Words listen as silence speaks
But I did see you...
Standing there and helplessly waiting for you

Pain was always pleasurable
You were kind to give it to me...

My love is timeless
My sadness is fearless

I wished to always say...
The veil was there for you to discover
Science & Art flow like Water & Air
Needing us more than we care

A beautiful ending it was
A sad beginning it caused

Is it really true?

2011-07-15T10:21:00.000-07:00

“I am because you are,
We exist in this age.
Waiting to be loved,
Hating to be loved.”

Something about it can never be true
Someone without it is never true

WHY goes to the HOW and shimmers with the WHEN
Time wraps the best in a velvet rosette.

Live it, Feel it, Heal it
Just to believe in it?

Lust plays the Icebreaker as Love Dances with Reason

The poem undulates on paper
I just stare and wonder.

Is it really true?
I ask you.

Unsung Ambiguity

2011-07-15T10:18:00.000-07:00

Feelings whisper as thoughts maneuver
Do Undulations govern us?
Coherence in ambiguity is an asset
Unsung melancholies...our deepest secrets

Shimmering light dipping in ideas
Escalating wishes intruding unsolicited dreams
Beauty meandering... as destiny dances

Siege of money and morals
Battle of self and society
War of illusion and reality

Zoom in to zoom out
Chaos is the blessed order
On the basis of biasness
Nature is the only truth.

Implicit drives to question
Explicit understandings to fear

Why then do we yearn for...?
The Perfect Life.

Why I do What I do

2011-03-14T10:25:00.000-07:00

Obvious questions wonder in the heartland
Dejected by the brain they haunt you
Some remain while others vanish
Why I do what I do remains.

Reasons turn into emotions
Emotions tumble into feelings
Feelings escalate into wishes
Wishes resonate in hinterland
They slow down soon.

How beautiful this silence is…
How extreme this feeling might be
How wishful this life can be
How rich this journey will be

Can we just flow sometimes?
Unscathed and untouched
Can we just live sometimes?
Undone and unfinished
Can we just forget everything?
Unfathomable and unavoidable
Can we just be?

Why the purpose?
Why the past?
Why not the present?
Why the future?
Why the question?

Films of ambition
Features of aspiration
Figures of asphyxiation
All…figments of my imagination

Fascinated with existence
Tinkering like a child
Thoughts to feed on…
This life was never mine

Beautiful

2010-12-17T23:23:00.000-08:00

Beautiful I am
Beautiful you are
Beautiful we are
Beautiful it is.

Eager I am
Engendered you are
Encapsulated we are
Endowed it is.

Angry I am
Altruistic you are
Accepting we are
Afflicted it is.

Understanding I am
Undone you are
Unfair we are
Unconditional it is.

Tired I am
Tough you are
Tortured we are
Testing it is.

Idealistic I am
Idiosyncratic you are
Infinite we are
Invisible it is.

Friendly I am
Frustrated you are
Fabricated we are
Funny it is.

Used I am
Uptight you are
Unionized we are
Ubiquitous it is.

Ludicrous I am
Lame you are
Lucky we are
Love it is.

How can you be sure?

2009-11-20T20:33:00.000-08:00

When actions and reasons are not coherent.
When people are not coherent.
When life is incoherent.

How can you be sure?

Fighting Back

2008-11-06T09:56:00.000-08:00

Confusions embedded in the subconscious are feeding on the holy grail. Somehow the missing ideologies are confidently being seen as the benchmark of society stagnation. Thinking,Watching and Understanding people always made me believe we are doing, thinking and perceiving in very shallow, channelized manner. The freedom of childhood, curiosity for knowledge, purity of love is being molested by values and systems of society where being corrupt and inturn relatively honest(most nonsensical ideology)is used for "getting ahead in life".

People possessing passions for knowledge/understanding without any personal benefit become typecasted as being non influential in society decisions. They are the ones doing the major innovations and end up getting the least benefit from the differential monetary system. The "Management Wizards" the more street smart and adaptable to society structures withdraw most benefits by adapting to "loop hole" system. With this trend general tendency of the youth is to obviously become powerful and end up in management rather than contributing to true society growth via technology.Music from ROCK Genre to Metal attractive to a lot of youth since their theme is regarding idealization thoughts and emotions/ rebellious ideas which gets them thinking/feeling off their feet. Growing up means being non-influenced by such indulgences and accepting ways to being tamed to labour for a means to existence.

Something is terribly wrong with ideas and methods followed presently. The means to do things with the purpose of learning/enjoying is absent majorly being taken over by social/monetary gratification.

Wake up and Fight. thezeitgeistmovement.com

Mesmerization

2008-07-12T07:37:00.000-07:00

Leaving behind the ghastly sorrows of mankind
Just to spend a beautiful evening in your aura
To share enlightening conversations with you
Drowning peacefully in your thoughts
Sharing deeper visions
Feeling my presence in your heart

The longing to hold you in my arms
Feeling the first touch
Breathing the genuineness of your love

Gentle and timeless stare
Evening sky blending into timeless darkness
Moonlight caressing your angelic face
Thoughts rushing through my head
Sometimes silence says it all...

How beautiful it can get...
I could never imagine
The serenity of love
The disposition of practicality

Tears roll down as I feel the reality
It was always meant to be...

Disturbance

2008-05-10T08:06:00.000-07:00

Strange proximities of happiness and achievement end up drowning in the sea of the stereotype. It is not working and will never work. A need for a better purpose and people haunts my soul time and again. (One of the happiest memories etched is my mind are of the ngo I worked in last summer.) Giving time to it and feeding on the present crooked identities really hurts sometime. It was never meant to be this difficult seeing the top view. Strangely it is. Identity has been and will be a dubious ideology. Too many choices and loop holes in everything. Self sufficiency seems paralled to nirvana but it is not. After two years in a new environment and understanding rheoteric patterns it feels sick to accept that the same problem is persisting since childhood. Apparently I find some people I truly like but their habbits and ideologies have become so tainted, its a tragedy personally for me. Its time to make some decisions. Hanging on to everything is not going to work for long. I am longing for simplistic forms of living. Often suffering from a superiority complex and showing to major symptoms of a personality disorder of Schizoid. Hopefully courage will take over exceptional and immature beliefs in my life.

I know sanity is prevalent but its overall base is still to be built.

Silence

2008-04-20T08:16:00.000-07:00

Its beautiful, how everytime a new realization ponders upon our thinking when silence is felt beneath our feet. Learning from people around and thinking when no one's around. The peace, solace and comfort of silence makes substance abuse sound cheap. The belief to be anything anytime, and still making mistakes knowing it harms us is just the absence of peace in our lifes. The bigger picture is always a mirage but the present is much more satisfying when its thought out in a very calm manner. Anger, anxiety, fear is just immaturity which feeds on us when we think in a cocooned manner. Maybe its never going to be that perfect but knowing that is more satisfying than any success ever achieved. I often envy calm people and love to learn form them all the time. When love overcomes hatred and acceptance overcomes expectations...is when you feel the power of silence is your life. Being satisfied with third standards is just being lazy but knowing where it works and where it fails is brilliant. A calm and composed mind can overcome any hurdle which is nurtured by potion of silence.

Forgiveness

2008-03-28T12:11:00.000-07:00

I never understood weather it is possible to forgive anyone truly. As humans we tend to care for people n love becomes something people really treasure. Having hurt people myself I did realize that sometimes nothing works. No matter how much you do or say, the one word or action ruins everything. Time I thought can be a healer but its just so much insecurity and confusion that builds up that finally you just let go. People do change. I have changed so much over time and when I look back at certain incidents, I just feel so sad for the way I acted. Life is always a learning experience but sometimes some lessons are just too hard n live on for a life time. I learnt the importance of being genuine and not looking down at people.If I could ever get apology from some people who I have totally lost touch with, It would actually mean the world to me.I still wish to do anything to get back things I have lost but sometimes realizing how the other person gets offended is so much of a reason to sit back and live the pain. Thinking of new ways to revive lost thoughts and feelings, soon to realize how it all becomes and remains in the mind only and sometimes comes down as words. I never thought I am a bad person but I do make big mistakes couresy my immaculate confidence and self belief. Some mistakes have been etched so deep in my heart that whenever someone tries to come close, it just hurts so much more. Achievements, matiruity, thoughts, helping people n all such things become futile sometime if the time is gone. When people say that you dont even know them so much after complications occur, It just kills everything. Well nobody can judge and will judge all I can say is that I am terribly sorry. The personal image does drop as society judges, let people be sometimes. Nobody is that perfect and feels a big loss time and again.I know what I need and still believe it is very tough to come. Well nobody can judge and will judge all I can say is that I am terribly sorry. Sorry.

What is reality...My confusions and confessions

2008-03-27T09:27:00.000-07:00

I honestly detest harbouring any sort of confusions in my mind. At a recent debate I was asked what my definition of reality is. Somehow my ability to present arguments which give a different angle all the time was strangled. Making up some good english sentences I left the stage admitting the judge got the better side of the idealist me. Coming out of pessimism earlier in my life, I had defined reality as the ability to achieve anything and everything. To my surprise there were to be many clauses to this thinking.Destiny was cursed enough thankfully, to not waste an iota of space in my mind.

Reality is governed by our hopes,passions,achievements,people. Most of the factors depend on us to draft ourselves the way we like.

In the field of science, art and commerce impossible is but a word of intimidation. Dreaming is a prerequisite to devlop the vision and the idea. Hardwork,Intelligence and genral personality play a major role in framing the outcome. All these things can me mended provided the resources and commitment is there.In short it is a possibility.

Relationships and people however have abstract behaviour. "You can never make anyone love you". Free will has to be respected to bring out feelings from within rather than being instigated by fear or social insecurity or any other dubious factor. It hurts idealistic people the most to accept this fact and maintain a psychological balance.

At a certain time a being does not possess the sources to achieve what he wishes. The causes can be limitation of thoughts,materialistic shortcomings, emotional bindings etc. Timing is again an important factor. Realising that timing is a factor is a bigger factor. Keeping these loopholes in mind reality can be defined as "sensible dreaming and subsequent achieving". This statement chokes the ideology of life being one's best friend to offer anything and everything we wish provided we work on it.

Nobody thought it was possible to have a concept like "relativity" until Einstein started working on it. His reality was a journey rather than a destination.He could never bring out "The Theory Of Everything" which combined Quantum Mechanics and General Relativity. Until now it has not been found. Scientists have been working on a theory called " String/Membrane Theory" for the last twenty years to solve this problem which just shows how some people think with no strings attached. The end result is obviously a fruit to savour, however the path is more brilliant. Of dreaming the extraordinary and woking towards it. Success in this regard depends on the same factors described before ranging from intelligence to limitations. The risk involved is much more but satisfaction as many believe putting themselves in other's shoes is higher.

Nature can often play spoil sport and there are even situations where man has won over nautre be the vertical spread of Earthquake ridden Tokyo or the entire existance of mankind during the Ice Age. However if the planet was to be striked out by some phenomena of nature we could not have done anything to prevent it. Or maybe we could have. Just our belief that we cannot, helps to convince us that we cannot. If someone starts working on such vague complications we might just have a solution.

The problem arises in estimating the power and influence of (Nature/ God/Supernatural Entities/Destiny). Anyone and everyone who has tried to give a scientific solution related to this has been unsuccessful. Till now basic concepts like Evolution have not been decoded.Religious doctrines often define the limitaion of the human race and offer advice to devlop faith.

Overall outcome comes to a choice of deciding your interpretation of reality. My Personal belief is that some universal power governs the entire system. I have no fear in accepting that I belive in challenging it whenever required.

We can dream about anything. The more we work for it our chances increase of achieving it. Let the road be your prerogative achievements will surprise you. This is reality for me.
That debate should have been won.

Swimming back to reality

2008-03-20T09:42:00.000-07:00

Some why’s need to be left
Some doors need to be shut
Some feelings need to be numb
Some happiness needs to be fake
Some hope needs to be there
Some dumbness should be fed in
Some illusions need to be real
Some dreams should be tainted
Some time needs to be given

So many people hate me

2008-03-01T07:59:00.000-08:00

I always grew up wanting to be liked by everyone.Wanting to be appreciated basically an attention seeking phobia. I mended my reality a lot and myself to some extend to get to the good side of a lot of people.Somehow it took me a few years to get good at it and then I mastered it.The one key was to be genuine and a good listener.But soon I realised I did not have an identity of my own and different people had different opinions of me. I had become a perfect public figure. For a long time I hung on to it but now I have started to break free of it. When I meet someone I can figure out which side of me to instigate. However, it seems so fake to be someone I am not just for their sake.Eventhough I always maintained a set of values, I was chained by people.I have started becoming what I want to and now so many people hate me. There are clashes of identity of being cool,emotional,artistic,intelligent,practical,idealistic,nice and I find comany for each sect. A perfect amalgamation is impossible and it always ends up being random.My lack of commitment and rather openess makes me hated in a lot of ways among different sects.The people I want to love the most end up hating me the most.Its a classic example of Genius Failure paradox. What saves me usually is my general love for mankind and kind nature.Honestly,I know what I am doing is just an effort for exposure and it is exactly how I define college life.I need stability sometime soon realising the minor futility of the concept.There is no end to learning and exposure.I will never be there.

It hurts sometime when you are hated.Maybe this is just a transition or just a begining.Since I dont choose a stereotypical life, I have got to get used to it.Just that I prefer having a few people who understand me the way I am and dont hate me ! I always have seen this reality becoming a mirage.

Hoping to practice what I preach
The Google approach to Life:
"Its Simple"

Hybrid Cars.....My technical Side

2008-01-27T06:59:00.000-08:00

As if to answer what 2008 will bring in the world of green motoring, the global price of oil passed the symbolic mark of $100 per barrel in early January. Oil is not going to last for more than 50 years seeing the current usage statistics and the natural gas is bound to be extinguished in about 100 years. The fossil fuels can produce up to 6.3 billion liters and it is estimated that natural processes can only absorb about half of that amount so there is a net increase of 3.2 billion tons of atmospheric carbon dioxide per year. This contributes excessively to Global Warming. There is the need for application of better and smarter technology keeping the global prospective in mind. We are experimenting with Bio-diesel engines, CNG, LPG, hybrids, electric cars, fuel cell cars.
There are only philosophies floating around these days and no concrete ideology is accepted to be the savior of the future. From CRDi engines we are moving to SIDi engines (Spark Ignition Direct Injection).The small sector market is the largest in India with the Alto being the largest selling car in 2007.Recently the Suzuki company developed a 660cc Turbo-engine for the mini sized car. The present technologies, seem to provide a temporary solution and hybrids excel in this front in most places around the world.
The hybrid car market in the US redefined all auto economics and sold l00,000 plus cars in 2007.The Toyota Prius itself sold about 35,000 units in November 2007. There are exceptions which make the scenario more interesting. In places like Germany 40% (courtesy : Bosch statistics) of the C02 generated is from electricity generation sector. Hence using Hybrid/Electric cars does not entirely solve the purpose of reducing Global Warming everywhere. All car batteries are conventional lead acid batteries. They worry that a hybrid utopia might turn into a toxic nightmare where the nickel metal hydride batteries in today's hybrids end up in landfills. However a running horse produces the same amount of CO2 as that produced by an automobile (courtesy: SAE confrence in Delhi 2008) so some analysts say that exhaust fumes do not contribute a lot to Global Warming. Hybrid cars is a not a revolutionary idea but is does have a very good sense of application and is most apt in the current affairs. What goes on under the hood to give you 20 or 30 more miles per gallon than the standard automobile?

White Noise

2008-01-13T03:30:00.000-08:00

A fresh start to old frustrations
A fresh start to new ambitions
A fresh start to feeling people

Endings can be strange though followed by fresh beginnings
I dont feel entangled with any burdens of love,regret,pain,happiness
It is so empty yet so peaceful
I am getting over her
It is so calm inside
The breeze is smoothly blowing
The sun is peacefully seetting
The leaves are quietly wispering
I am just caressing

Randomness can be disappointing
Commitment can be healing
Reality can be beautiful

The present is nothing but resilient

its a new beginning..........

I love you so much.....

2007-12-29T23:31:00.000-08:00

Why do I love you so much?
Why cant I forget you?

How much can I escape you?
How much can I escape reality?
I use to always laugh at emotional losers
Now fate is laughing at me….

I don’t wish to write in fear it moves me closer to you….
I love you so much….

My imagination is moving to higher dimensions
This seams more real to me….
This world seems so painful….
I can do anything to be with you
Beautiful moments are etched in my memory
I cant erase it
Please help me god….

I am going insane….
My tears have lost their value..
I feel so lonely
I feel so fake

I believe so much in myself
Your one thought shatters it to pieces and pieces
I feel all achievements are useless….

Please god…….I do so many good things…..I help so many people….I feel so many people….
Help me god….
My life has been going from bad to worse….
No one; absolutely no one to love….only street children to love and feel
Getting higher on pseudo platforms n more hollow from inside
Laughing more n more on outside and howling on the inside

I still wake up in the morning wishing for your good health and good life….
I still sleep thinking about you n praying for your happiness
I was never this weak….I am capable of being loved by so many people….
I still love you so much….

I am made for a very bright future….
I still feel it so artificial….
I will work for the UN, Directing a movie, have a company listed on the nasdaq, open many orphanages, drive a Rollys Royce Phantom..
All useless…..without you

I am such a gentleman and feel so ashamed of emotionally hurting you so much…
Please forgive me….

Maybe I will not see the new year…
Maybe I don’t want to see this new year…
Nothing in this world seems dear to me…
I am courageous enough to kill myself….
But not cowardly enough to escape you….

Why cant I tell myself that you don’t care for me…
I live on hope….
I take long walks and think about you….
I feel you everywhere…
I get high only to feel you more in the most unimaginable decency
I was so nice to you but never good enough…..

I give people relationship advice…
I stare at myself in the mirror and ask why?

Don’t know how long I will live….
My arrogance has been slaughtered by the pain I am feeling

I know you hate me….
Maybe this will free me from this world and pain someday..
This is my hope for happiness

I love honest words and feel every word I write….

I am...

2007-11-08T05:22:00.000-08:00

An artist by nature
A manager by profession
An intellectual by liking
A philanthropist by heart
A bastard by wisdom
A friend of emotions
A lover in my dreams
The one in reality

Is my change a reality?
How real is my change?
I am understanding how to live my life
I am believing I can live my life
I am feeling happiness again in my life

Friends is not what I need
Love is not my greed
Hatred is not to my breed
Sex is not my feed

My mind is the creator and destroyer of reality
My values define honesty without duality
There is egoism reaching out with humbleness
There is a confidence with fumbleness
I am a child realizing I was cocooned for a long time
My past was a gift from the spirit and the present is just fine
I have become an idealist with practicality
Accumulated wisdom which is a vitality
Every failure kills me deep from inside
Obvious mistakes in my subconscious mind reside

Many times I sound like an arrogant bastard
I am not self obsessed though I do have problems liking people
Emotional intelligence is present and its just the icing on the cake
Politeness comes naturally for genuine people
Insight comes for the others.
I am not the one in many visualizations and ideologies
There is hypocrisy and the want to be the best
Maturity sinks below dignity and mistakes rise beyond the horizon.

I wait for synchronous thinking
I wait for psychological linking
Confusions has been deep routed in the subconscious
Logic is the base for the conscious
The iceberg has to be melted
“It’s a possibility” I have felt it.
Too many quotes as the pacemaker
Too many mistakes as the wisdom maker
A longing for love and lust for sex
Contradictory thinking and enlightened zest.

Gift

2007-09-28T12:44:00.001-07:00

Hi…since am so far away (thank god for that!) n this is the cheapest way to get a treat out of you so here goes some lies!!

In a world that is virtually real
It becomes tough to hold on……
In a world that is politically incorrect
It becomes tough to remain untorn….
In a world that is sexually emotional
It becomes tough to find people long gone…
In a world that is morally flawed
It becomes tough to have values which are not molested upon….
In a world which is satanically religious
It becomes tough to pray until dawn…..
In a world which is colored black n white
In a world of prejudice n false might…
Were Mandela n Gandhi right?

This is the world as I see it
You have to resurrect it bit by bit

You can make the mirage a reality if you wish
You can be a Micheal Moore if you wish
There can be evanescence of Marilyn Monroe’s if you wish
You can be a Mother Teresa if you wish
You can be a Dalai Lama if you wish
You can prove that Mandela and Gandhi were right, if you wish

You are the one that is all I want to say dear
The world is at your feet and waiting for you
I have known you for long now
Judged you when your unawareness has kept you busy
There is a perfect blend and coherence of Simplicity and Beauty
Your values are commendable and decision making sane
Some confusions and immaturity still seeps in making you a real person
There is rigidity in you which can be harmfulTime is a great teacher and the right balance will be mastered
Sweetness reaches a new dimension and you can be so nice
Dumbness reaches a new dimension and you can be so stupid!!
I have so had so many laughs with you and memories just sweep by in my head
Made so much fun of you n still you have laughed all along with me….
Time has moved on n friendship looses its essence with time
Different people in ourselves and around gain influence as u must have realized
I did not remember your birthday n you only call on my birthday
The road will only go where we take it

I don’t have words to explain how special you are
Your one thought brings happiness incomparable by far
People might call you comfortably dumb
For those people feelings have long gone numb
I have always made fun of you
But my respect for you is so true
So rejoice cause an angel was born this day
I have been blessed enough to be your friend till today
Thank you so much for the time you have ever given me
For u will not believe how secure it has led me to be
I don’t boast of liking people as such
But you have changed my opinion so much

God bless you n have a great day!!!

Your friend with loads of lies
Rishabh

IF.......

2007-09-01T12:22:00.000-07:00

The word beats the silence far across
It mutes the thunders torturing my soul
I feed on fantasy for just a while……..
This road seems to go for miles and miles…..
Struggle seems to loose significance
As life moves towards magnificence
It sucks the pain out of reality
Seems much more than vitality

What if I never grew up so early…
What if I never witnessed the violence’s that I did…
What if I ever made friends….
What if u loved me….
For once….just once…
My faith in god would be restored

Emotions storm inside as my life stares at me
Misunderstood realities mock at me
My inability to live the perfect life
to cry and still dream of the perfect life

the word if strengthens me to hold on….
To stitch the realities ruthlessly torn
To feel the reasons and logic long gone

But still there is comfort in pain…
For change is what we all are afraid of
Surely there is nothing to gain
My feet are stuck and it’s hard to move on…

I take deep breaths to understand more than I can write
Nothing in life ever seems to go right….
Its just a will survive
To prove that my values were right…..

If I can love anyone again….
If I can be loved by anyone again…
If I can feel the zest in my viens again…
If I can believe once again that “ I am the one”

My life will become worth living…
The sky will tear and the grounds will shake
For I have come to existence again
I will move faster than light and caress through all the black holes
For I am the universe and the universe is me….
If only I can…if only…

happy to be sad.....

2007-07-19T08:01:00.000-07:00

the depthness of life seems too shallow
i meet people who are very hollow
feelings are squashed under the feet
i dont even get time to weep
i am moving faster than i ever did
as even my shadow has started to haunt me

i feel like an intellectual fool
i failed and now i must pay my dues
my heart aches n begs me to cry
still i just feel like holding on to those feelings
there is comfort in pain
where is god now when i ask him for a personal gain....

where did i go wrong
what else could i have done
all i wanted was your happiness
with some love in return
u did not even care to take the gifts i collected for u
i cherished them n lived in them for a long time...
how could u be so inhuman....
but i know what u went through
n i really respect u

my selfish nature abounds in my writing
it was my fault as u never loved me....
it was one truth i never wanted to accept
for i never give up....
but even my best was not enough....

i have lost my poetic sense....
the beauty in my poems dissolved...
for the happiest man is sad today
wondering how life ever became this way....

i have wasted enough time crying....
and i wish that my writing devours the tears in my eyes now....
am so happy that i am crying now...
its a new feeling....
i want to forget everything n take it out of me...
i lack the courage to be alive n the nievity to die....

but i will live again as i feel myself again...
i wish u all the happiness in your life
and this dream which is my life will come true...

2007-03-09T23:42:00.000-08:00

why was i born...the question haunted me since the age of 8....i started with nothing in life... .be it materialistic, emotonal,spiritual.there was nothin... nothin at all....started as the laughing stock n basically i grew up too early....i lacked that innocence....started thinkin too much at an early age.......i decided to put an end to it....i wanted money,public fame,respect n power.....i sorted out the way of making people feel inferior....they would respect me out of fear....somehow it never worked out.....once the apex is reached in terms of social status i let it go....falling in the trap of trusting people...n i tumble back to where i started only makin it worse by exposin myself.....then i try n instill some maturity in myself.....find a purpose of living,reason for existance and happiness was the only answer.....a mix of materialistic,emotional,spiritual,public fame came the right answer....i decided to stop following anyone n make my own way....n i realized with conviction i got them to follow me....that just made me loose my faith in them n made me laugh at them.....the gullability is so seen....so i become cold....doing what i feel is right...n i end up feeling a bit lonely at times...i suffer from a superiority complex.....its difficult to find people worth putting into.....having fallen so many times......reachin the apex of the social circle i feel i dont like these people...i dont like anyone.....going a bit low the people more humble end up boring me at times.....seeing a soluton is tough...practicality is tough but the answer.....a rolling ball is the right way....do i have people of my clang somewhere....cant see them n i seem to perfer now leaving my mark on only a few people.....to the rest the mask feels right n practical....but i should be happy...i never expected to be appreciated by them....only a few people will be able to get my warmth n i will get from a few....i do my job being secure n leave the rest on the almighty...whose presence is an illusion to keep me happy..this is the purpose....shakesphere said that " life is a tragedy to those to feel n funny to those who think"....n i work on a right mix....i will succced in the materialistic world...just hope to live up to my morals…with nobody having the ability to judge me other than myself….i will practice selfishness with practicality with a right amount of emotional input varing person to person